Through my Daughter’s Eyes

I have learned an incredible amount about learning, teaching and leading from many people in my career, but for the past few years, I think I have learned the most in my role as a parent and through the eyes of my children.  This post is about what I have learned through the eyes of my eight year old daughter who will be entering 4th grade in the fall.

I know I’m her mother, but Ashlyn truly is one of the brightest children I know – all the “numbers” support this – she scores advanced on every assessment, usually with a perfect score; she has scored high enough on a myriad of assessments that she has been labeled “gifted and talented”, her report cards are perfect, she wins numerous academic awards etc., etc., etc.,

More important to me… she is a voracious learner!  She spends most of her free time asking inquisitive and amazing questions, and she diligently seeks the answers through any source she can get her hands on.  Google and You Tube are two of her best friends.  We have spent countless hours researching every minute detail of her favorite animals so she can write books and stories.  For every bug, lizard or other obscure creature she catches in the yard, we have to hunt down its species, its ideal environment and what it eats so we can care for it in our home.  For every pet she has wanted us to buy her she has combed through online research so she can make her plea to us with all of the evidence to back up why it is a good idea – she does this so well; we now run a small zoo.

Through books and online tutorials, she has taught herself to draw, to play songs on the harmonica and the keyboard, and to fold origami.  She conducts science experiments. She has learned how to care for every one of her pets.  She recently started her own blog and has written to the Humane Society asking for their advice on the best way an eight year old might give back to their organization because she wants to thank them for bringing us her cat.  Ashlyn is a reader, a writer… a highly effective communicator.  She is a creator and a critical thinker.  She is passionate about learning

…and she does not like school. 

Some years have been better than others, but overall school is something we have mostly tolerated.

My husband and I are both educators, we believe in public education, and we support our community schools, but it has been a challenge for us watching her experience school – even as she attends a school that California has honored as “Distinguished”.

Despite the fact that the school has Promethean Boards in the classrooms and Netbooks for every child to use, we rarely see evidence of projects or assignments that demonstrate they are in use… even when I know my daughter and many of her peers are highly proficient users of the technology sitting in the rooms. The assignments and tests that come home most frequently are multiple-choice or fill in the blank type activities which require limited thinking.  While we save many of the projects, creations, stories, and books my daughter has created at home, most of what comes from school goes into the trash can – they are not things she is proud of… they are things she has endured. My husband and I have spent the past four years pulling teeth to get her to complete the packets of worksheets that come home weekly for homework – and to be honest, we have reached a point where we often do not even require her to do them anymore.  She writes her blog posts or learns something new of her choosing instead.

While my daughter has certainly had some good experiences in school and teachers I truly admire, I can’t begin to express my frustration over some of the conversations I have had over the years about different ways school might be able to better challenge and engage my daughter.  I have heard too many excuses… the class size is too big, we have too much material to cover, we have to get them ready for the test, the other students need me more… the list goes on.  It is not my intent to communicate here that I blame any of teachers – in fact, I believe that almost every year she has been in school, she has had hard-working teachers who are trying to do their best in the system in which they have been asked to work.

On paper, my daughter is a school success story, but in reality, school has been failing her.

So… who is at fault?

Every one of us who serves in an educational leadership role – whether at the Federal, State, District or Site level – has to accept a little piece of the blame.  Whether intended or not, we have created a system that values test scores above all else – they are what we highlight; they are what we celebrate; they are what we use to determine good schools, “distinguished schools”, from failing ones and “good” teachers from “bad” ones… And somewhere along the way too many schools and too many classrooms have left truly authentic, appropriately challenging and highly engaging learning behind.

We have done the same in my District, certainly not intentionally, but when we entered Program Improvement a few years ago (despite many years of consistent growth!), test scores became a primary focus, and while we have done a lot of good work over the past few years, we have also made some mistakes… particularly in our communication of what we value.

What I love about the conversations we are starting to have now, is that we are talking more about learning and less about test scores.  We are re-thinking our vision, and we know it includes so much more than what test scores will indicate.  We are talking about providing students with highly engaging and content-rich curriculum and instruction, and we are asking ourselves more questions about how to incorporate technology and make learning more relevant.  We are asking more teachers to step into leadership roles and to help us push our thinking, and we are telling stories of our learning.  We are making this shift one step… one day at a time but we are relentless.  I expect that this will be a great year for us and our students will learn some amazing things… and when this happens – the test scores will take care of themselves.

What I have learned from my daughter is that when a child is passionate about learning (which I believe every child is when they enter school), school should be a place they want to be EVERY DAY.  Seeing school through my daughter’s eyes has pushed me to think about the type of learning opportunities I want for her, and I want nothing less for the students I serve in my District. We should be creating experiences in our districts and our schools that cause students to celebrate the END of summer break – not the beginning of it!

5 thoughts on “Through my Daughter’s Eyes

  1. Great blog post – my daughter is going into K this year and I fear the same will happen to her. I teach HS, and the pressure on the test is very high…but I am doing what I can to make learning be our focus and not test scores! Good luck to you, your daughter and your district!

    • Thank you for your comments. It is a struggle for me everyday! I believe so strongly in community schools, but I ache for my daughter when it is not working out for her. Thank you for all you are doing to be an amazing educator and difference maker in the lives of children!

  2. Your point is a good one – that everyone has a role to play and must accept a piece of the blame for making “achievement” relevant to test scores the most important thing. However, change also has to come individual by individual. Teachers need to look their students in the eye each day and be able to ask themselves, am I doing all I can to make education relevant and dynamic for this child? and this child? and this child? It is a brave act in some places (so happy that at present in B.C. this isn’t a pressure) to teach the child and not to the test. When teachers put children first, the administrators that have “test pressure” on the brain need to honour this and respect it. My philosophy is that elementary education is really about making children love school and helping them learn how to learn. Certain skills are necessary – learning how to read, think mathematically, work with others, etc But going crazy over content at the expense of student passion just isn’t okay. It is wonderful that you and your husband have supported your daughter at home to pursue her learning. But so sad that she doesn’t say she likes school. Let’s hope changes come fast and furious for her sake!

    • Your point about school being a place where we help our students “learn how to learn” is an important one. We need to help them discover their unique gifts and talents as part of the process. We need to encourage them to WANT to learn more and give them the tools to do so. We are starting to better introduce this idea in the district where I work. I am also pleased to say that my daughter is very connected to her 4th grade teacher this year, and while she has not gone so far as to say she likes school, she does speak highly of many things her teachers has been asking her to do. I am hopeful for a good year.

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